Sunday, December 23, 2007

the sash the sill and the window pane

the sash the sill, and
the window pane
all bear witness to the
saddest refrain
as coach and carriage
pull away the little
boy does remain
awash in man sized pain
soulful whistle of the
eastbound train
clackity clackity
clackity clack
the sash the sill, and the
window pane all bear witness
to the hard cold rain
washes away the child
who did remain.

Friday, December 14, 2007

life

did i tell you my love of

a time long ago

when the birds did not sing

and the sky did not cry?

when the world was sitting

empty and children did not play

did i tell you my love

of my life before you.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

hollow man

devils sneezes
westward breezes
whistle through
the hollow man
he gots no place
to lay his heavy
head
wisps of smoke
from a long dead
heart
torments,tenderly
warming soothing
forms a vision
a crevice a niche
softly caressing
the hollow man
everybody passing by
neath an endless sky
just keeps asking why

hollow man walks across

a hollow land.

Friday, November 23, 2007

the journey

Where there is feeling there is healing.
Where there is healing there is growth.
Where there is growth there is understanding,
and understanding brings an appreciation
whether good or bad for the trek that we call life.
It is never fair. it is never even.
It hurts when it should not.
it ends in the midst of joy. it
weaves a tapestry of sadness and pain
of joy and sorrow
of melancholy days in the sun
of passion filled nights re-run
we who carry on bring comfort
for those who have not faced life
before their time.Dear Cassie
we must remember our lost ones
in their prime full of life
lest we fall impotent and
no one is left to remember
them as we do.

Monday, November 19, 2007

blues man

As I amble towards
this last goodbye
lingerings of dealings
scatterings of faces
distorted places
burnt offerings
frail sacrifices
abandon me
it is as though
the music went out of me
it lost its interest in me
a roller coaster
living in me
while it all becomes
settled in my mind
sleeping with my
dagger not so to find
you see for with my
dagger i can make
you stagger alone
down a twisty muddy road
where blues men
strain sorrowful notes
through whiskey bottles
and cigarette smoke frame
soft and sweet tunes
milky white, pink tendrils
reach ever upwards tinting
the walls a sublime pink
magnolias to caress my face
Sonny Terry invites me
inside out of the snowy night
and into the world of
coffee shops where effortlessly
his blues harp tears apart my soul
courtyards holding hands
gently kissing ruby lips on a
milk white palette.
all of this comes back to me
As I amble towards this
last goodbye

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

death upon my soul

i imagine then
it is past
time to say
goodbye
and watch
true love die
for you see
i cannot bear
to feel every tear
upon the fabric of
my soul
i failed to reach the goal
for
i knew when true love died
it's when i said good bye
that's when the music
died when it lost
it's interest in me.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

on days past

focusing on the
kitchen chair
steadily i begin
to stare
at the molten
marble
table square
yellow and white
flying creatures
lick and bite
what is it
walls are breathing
watch my fingers
bubble, seething
is it so
it must be so
for now does
my toe slowly
split in two
a funky
gibbet
molasses in
green says
the spiteful
whippet
Mickey and Donald
slip out the door
as the floor gently
masses a
wave against
the wall
collapses
ceiling breathes
tile and ceramic
wreathes
what am
i obliged
to do?
strain away
from four way
hits of
window pane

Friday, October 19, 2007

wake for me
my gentle
one
sing your songs
on distant shores
share with me
forgotten glories
fill my heart
with endless
stories
set my
soul afire
breathe life
into this
my funeral pyre
tell me of
my gentle
one
who travels
near and far
of shinning moments
in the sun
golden bonfires
satin green
silent moments
bronze sheen
tell me of
forgotten nights
of secrets shared
where lovers
dared and
fell contrite

my gentle one

tell me now
give into haste
speak to me
lest memories
spin become
debased

o gentle one
of times we
spent
of love we lent
of rings and
circles
beneath the
heavens
when we
did fly o'er
heather fields
sword and shield
to lie upon
o gentle one do not
be gone
o gentle one

baggage

How long will
you
torture me
hold me
accountable
for the sins of
another
how long will
you
smother
the love
how long will
I
torture
you
hold you
accountable
for the sins
of another
smother
the love
how long?

Thursday, October 11, 2007

another night
sleepless on the
bathroom floor
stumble to my feet
slam into
the shower door
eyelids stuck to
my cheeks
soon to greet
the harpy's
shriek

reality calls
trying to forget
rushing water
and cotton balls
dried vomit
on the walls

slowly in the
mist of waking
where knees
are weak
and body shaking
find i joyful
release from
my torment
for
this
is
the moment
that makes
it all worth while

peaceful stream
slender dream
of a long ago
when neither man
nor women
governor
nor lawman
could my musings
stay
standing there
i fain to hear
the sweetest
cheer ever i have
known

my lost Love's
voice
her sweet refrain
to remain
as puke
fills my drain

a brief respite
for now the
comes the beast
deadly plight

around the edges
jagged searing
always jeering
deadly potion
wrongful notion

confusing
men who stand on
ledges
women sitting
on their sills
empty bottle
of sleeping pills

long black tongue
flicks about
putrid dragon
licks his snout
brain unlatching
doorknob scratching
talons search my brain
as blood runs down
the drain
in the pouring rain

banshee screaming
soul revolts
vapors steaming
all is blackened
life is wrapped
in silent desperation
angels cry their
blackened effusion
this depression
my final sin
darkness light
an endless plight
i can hardly wait
for tonight
Jack Daniels will
call and
clear my sight








Wednesday, October 10, 2007

dreams

when I wake up in my dreams
I see the memories that live in
between the seams of
and on sleep and good morn
I find you have gone
to the blaring glaring horn
when I wake on sleepy street
watching all the bubble gum bubbles
float on by
I see the all
the woulda shoulda couldas
wave goodbye.
when I wake up
and find dreams of you

Friday, October 05, 2007

night terror

darkened hall
leads to light
darkened hall
in the night
blackened greasy
nimble fingers
dance upon
crisp bedsheets
slithering about
bits and pieces
reaching out
fetid breath
screaming visions
pray for death
sweating fears
freezing years
stomach aching
stinking rain
trickling down
suffocating
defecating
in the
endless night

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

letters from the l plains

How are you my love? Light of my life. It has taken me what seems like forever to find you separated as suddenly as we were thrown together in that time of man's war with himself. I have sat and watched the summer rains falling on my Texas plains, and tried to remember your beauty.All that I could call were frail ghostlike images, stale fragrances, and faint refrains
from so long ago.
Tis been a life time since i have felt your tender touch or heard the healing melody that is your voice. I fear there is nothing left to say and only the most despised of things to do. Forgive me mlady for as I sit in the loneliness that is this exile of mine I ask and answer myself with the most negative of questions and answers. Even now I do not have the slightest hope that I have lived on in your heart.
Can it be so that this sojourn of mine has been in vain? Have I stayed too long in the wandering ways ? Does it not matter that I have loved only you in my heart though my fragile nature has strayed on occasion? I fear what I know to be and that is you are lost to me forever.
I pray for your mercy, I beg forgiveness for falling into your life and then for running away
across the wide furious ocean. Sad. this that one who once was so alive and carefree would now
be filled with death and trepidation. Mad, that fear kept one from returning to the comfort of your bosom. Glad, that one will not await a response but will wander to the wonderland where one will hear,smell feel and taste what one has lost.

With great devotion,
and utter cowardice
as always
drunk and depressed
your lost one

PS I promise to stop
drinking when i see your face again

fear

scritching scratching
door lock
unlatching
pull the covers
up over your
head
pray oh pray
to just be
dead
scratching scritching
door lock
unlatching

a simple harmonic motion

in my minds eye
finds I there
a notion of
m'lady fair
a great commotion
did occur
for none could
compare
with my lady fair
I did concur
at which point
need i
a lair
espied i
a tree
where i
did hide
to catch a
glimpse of
my passing pride
a notion commotion
a simple harmonic motion
hidden deep inside

Monday, October 01, 2007

descent into madness

gentle breezes
bright blue skies
silent freezes
silky soft thighs
faraway sprinkles
verify terrify as
darkening clouds
obscures the veil
weeping aloud
blackening rain
hell hounds wail
searing pain
visceral sea
no more to feel
the bleeding bleed
rushing towards
me as
an endless fen
as a
satin chamber
vomits out
screaming men
railing reeling
flesh is boiling
teeth a-gnashing
love is torment
and hate divine
kindly eat my
tortured mind
silently cursing
as hearts wind
down
endlessly craving
madness as crown

long lost love
rats are slaving
eating my soul
a mourning dove
a jagged hole
ragged breathing
such a pity
sliding along
an endless
ledge into
schizo city
peering deep
within the
hellish keep
descent complete
madness

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

cheating on a dream

dead calm
I find
sweaty palm
tequilla on my mind
a silent roar
ripples on the
shore
a dreamer
of dreams
in between
streams
banana boats
on moon beams
float by
gently slipping
toe nails gripping
across the
pastel sky
nighttime
regrets
on velvet lips
mahogany rosettes
form
comely hips
fleeting spirits do
comply
carressing
distressing
aniline dye
not the one
besides me
lie
cheating on dream

Monday, September 17, 2007

love is a photograph

brittle and old

love is a photograph

fresh and bold

love is a photograph

faded and cold

love is a photograph

covered in mold

love is a photograph

that never grows old

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

sdg

sit i now in the moments of
my greatest despair nothingness
around me grows
staring down
into the fiery
eyes of a local clown
Copper Red
terrible memories
spewing from my head
brimstone graces
my bloody jaw
wretched faces
snow white laces
evil places
obscures the
horror within
the gaping
fetid maw
rush of colour
flash of pain
gentle
hallucinogenic rain
oh dear God
stop the pain
instead a sweet refrain
which leads me
to my home my sod
precious God
do not leave me alone

Sunday, September 02, 2007

Fiona Fair

And then i spy
within mine eye
the lie
which has
ere been my life
tis nothing there
which would compare
to the constant strife
that i now bear
without a care
She was
dearest to me
the briefest tear
upon
this fabric of
my soul
a ghoul
a wraith
a tiny mole
tis nothing there
which would compare
to the sanctity of
thy soul
a wisp of Love's
sweet breath
to clear the
fetid air
that i should
know a moments
peace i give
to you it's
lease
tis nothing there
which would compare
to m'lady so sweet
and fair
air which she
doth breathe

Thursday, August 16, 2007

M'lady of the moor

M'lady of the moor

when first i seen

standing she was

on a cnoll

of Kelly

green



A moonraker

was she


standing proud

amidst the

crowd

she wore
babes breath

round her

ivory neck

a wispy cloud

for a crown

a shining sword

hanging down

a sliver cord

wore she

her

eyes ablaze

with the

fiercest gaze

transfixed

me in

a daze

besotted

by the

haze

allotted

a portion

of

heavenly mead

she did bid

me to plead

for sweet release

instead

i begged to be
bound neath

the winters moon
silently gazing

into loves tender face

unending joy
to my disgrace

forever wanting

M'lady of the moor

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

eldest son

sad little boy
looking out
from under the
bed
sad little boy
the things
he hears
poor little boy
scurries about
trying to
mend
broken lives
trying to
tend
to
that which
he
did not
rend
mad little boy
off to war
unable to
mend
or
tend
to that
which he did not rend
poor sad mad
little boy
when will it
all
end

Monday, August 13, 2007

would i

would i
hold your
face
in my
trembling
hands
would i
gaze
so long
into your
eyes
would i
kiss you
so tenderly
would i
let you go
on deaths
dying door
i would
not

Thursday, August 09, 2007

dreams of you

when i wake up
in my dreams I
see the memories
that live in the
between the seams
sleep and good morn
when i find you have gone
to the blaring glaring
horn
when i wake on
sleepy street
watching all
the bubble gum
bubbles float
on by
i see the all
the woulda shoulda
couldas
wave goodbye.
when i wake
up and find
dreams of you

Friday, July 27, 2007

CHASTISED

How horribly lonely
is this space.
behind these terrible
blood smeared gates
self containing
self impaling
waiting
hating
craving
a look
inside
forsaken
awaken
and
feel my shame
my pain
help extinguish
the anguish
that burns synapses
reeks of rotting
corpses
is it stupid to think
that anyone would
ever want to understand
what it is like
to sit on the brink,
whereI am
lost much less what I feel.
self loathing
i am evil
sans clothing
i do not dserve
understanding.
i did not understand
while i was cutting
a broad swath through life.
who are you that
you think anyone
could ever love you
no!
be watched
be scolded,
Chided,
scorned
derided
feel the wrath
of the self-righteous.
never know
nor ever care
what i feel.
feel
More sorrow
burdened hounded
be killed
resurrected
life reflected
until the final horns
have sounded.
a man of sorrows.
you are in the place
you were born to
this is your lot
in life
this is why you are here
you will never feel
Her soft kiss again
never trace Her outline
in the darkness
never feel Her love,
you are worthless.
you are judged
you are
chastised

Monday, July 23, 2007

death

old women avert their eyes
tears of blood horrid cries
a shroud a shroud
cover it with a shroud

it is evil it is dead
run away
it's shadow
brings great dread

old women cry
i don't know why
it is only i
passing by

my greatest fear

la mia più grande paura
è essere solo
la mia più grande paura
è morire solo
la mia più grande paura
è dimenticare come scrivere
la mia più grande paura
è causarla addolora
la mia più grande paura
l'ama
la mia più grande paura
non l'ama
la mia più grande paura
vive
la mia più grande paura
non vive
la mia più grande paura
è la mia più grande paura

Monday, July 16, 2007

the chosen

terrible paths we tread
dirty roads running red
while those behind us
party on
just missed the reality bus
till dawn

never will they know
the terrible paths we tread
apathy do they sow
eat their bread
drink their wine
have no spine
dirty roads running red

Thursday, July 12, 2007

i would lay with you

i would lay
with you
not so near
only just
within
your
sight
i would say
the words
that bring
delight
i would gaze
upon your
countenance
heavenly
radiance
i would stay
with you
play with
you
grow old
with you
if you would
lay me
not so near
only just
within
my
sight

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

unforgettable

unforgettable
are you
imprinted
you are
em·bla·zoned
on
ingrained
upon
etched
within
my very being
where find memories
of the
effervescent spirit
that sustains me
while i struggle
that refreshes
while i sleep
that i may
never touch
unforgettable


Friday, June 22, 2007

moving on

fond
memories
painful
regrets
cherished
memories
sweet release
from constant
torment.
for now i fly
into limitless
sky
goodbye
say I
to all your
desolate
places.

Lost

lost within
the darkness
lost below
the light
lost without
your love
lost

lost without
a hope
no way
to cope
lost

Thursday, June 21, 2007

BURNT

Burnt doll babies
fell from grace
years of tears
trickle from
their face

Pistols and bourbon
bourbon and beers
vile rotten memories
ooze from
their ears

sinful crustaceans
scramble about
come to eat
their rotting flesh
removing all doubt

burnt doll babies

reluctant sojourner

Voice
softly comforting
spinning tales of
hope, love, and
consolation
Hands
touching me
drying my
tears
renewing, me
Lips
to kiss
binding me
keeping me
safe from harm

Monday, June 18, 2007

wanting

Do you know?
can you see?
Do you feel?
could it be?

What you hear
what you see
comes naturally

Tis the end
of the line
when shame
doth climb

and all
around
must come
to ground

to be weighed
to be measured
to be found
wanting

snow queen

Brilliant sunshine leaps from a newly
lain blanket of
fluffy popcorn snow
Fierce eyes challenge me
comets of snow streak
across sparkling blue skies
Lightning bright rows
of stately porcelain
melting snow on a steamy brow
brilliant sunshine in the
you are the snow queen
A peace on you take heart,
it will not last forever
avoid the dart, be clever
no matter what you hear
avoid the fear
It will not last forever
As long as you endeavour
It will not last forever
Don't hold your breath
avoid the
clever,
lever,
never
sweet is the smell to your nose
your death a perfect rose
A peace on you Take hear
tWe do not last forever

a toast for mlady

May the sun always shine

on you and yours

May the beer never run dry

and may you never

lose the sparkle

in your eyes

Monday, June 11, 2007

breezes

breezes blowing
gently stirring
secret conversations
from a long ago
time
feeble-minded
murmurings
of mine.

laughing loving
whispering
always there to find
feeble-minded
murmurings
of mine

waking while i sleep
sleeping while i wake
ever smiling
reconcilling
feeble-minded
murmurings
of mine

bits and pieces
from
long ago
help me hold me
when times are low
feeble-minded
murmurings
of mine

sweet conversations
gentle intonations
urging on should i slow
reminding me
binding me
feeble-minded
murmurings
of mine

breezes blowing
gently stirring
secret conversations
from a long ago time
feeble-minded
murmurings
of mine.

Free

The wind blows free

It carries my love

to thee

the wind blows free

wind

The wind is free

blows goes

ever on

round the

whole wide

world

Touching all

it passes
joyous masses

bringing greetings
lovers meetings

from here

to yonder

there

the wind is free

blows goes

ever on

round the

whole wide

world.

Friday, June 01, 2007

every day ness

Mcdonalds
have it
your
way
moto
blue tooth
i pod

What!?
no i don't hear you
i am busy

what there's a war
where
is that on sci-fi??
is arnold in it???
what
not happening here
what
no, well not my
prob man
no body told
em to go

McDonalds
have it your way
moto
blu tooth i pod
i don't care
not my job
not my concern
i pod
moto

what

Friday, May 18, 2007

in the fading light do i see

all the darkness washing

over me


nothing more do I know

falling face first in the snow





crimson stain spreads about

spring rains will wash it out.





steam arising from the maw
lonely dog licks his paw





in the darkness do i see

blinding light
washing
over me

melancholic manifestations

i sat on a hill
over looking the sea
a brilliant palette of
cherry,orange
blue black
and purple
did i see.

Horses and dragons
dancing past
how long will
the peace and
harmony last.

gentle breezes
wafting by
soaring geese
catch the eye

I sat on a hill
overlooking the sea
rockets and mortars
did i see

peace and harmony
have run away

welcome to
the bright new
day.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

apathy

what did it
matter
that you
said you
still cared?
knowing
my soul was
bared
i was
scared
never shared
unprepared

where did
the days
go
craze, daze
full of praise

why was it so
hollow
when the dark
did
follow
what did it matter
now
that
bit is
gone
you
rest in
oblivion
addiction
submission
to the
apathetic nature
of the
topical anesthetic

border

Life on the border
sour smelly
odd stained dirt
gang signs in blood
bamboo stands
mesquite patch
scrub oak
colonias in
bright blue
electric green
homes
junkes
melting into each
other
life on the border

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

mind dance

Cherry blossoms
Dance by
Golden Eagles
soring high
purple sky
hazel rain
duck nips
at my hips
gentle tugs
lady bugs
call me to
awakening
dragging me
from
my splendid
dreams

aliens

Life on the border
en la frontera
rio bravo
rio grande
dark brown snake
slices through the
heart of a land
giving life
bringing death
rich dark
sod
gentle
nod
Hola Que Tal
Como Estas
Muy Bien
Damn Wets
tobbaco stained
spewing hate
Pobre Senor
Perdon
es mas late
estamos en el
pais
estamos en el
sangre
estamos en la
cultura
estamos en
ustedes
estamos en el
sangre del
pais.perdon.

Fair Stranger

Then comes the flight
of the Elven Princess
over,under
through my
defences
Then comes the flight
of the elven princess
showing her might as
flutterby's and butterfly's
take flight
Flowers she raises
from long deep sleeps
oranges, greens,
yellows and blues
flittering fluttering
as life renews
Then comes the flight
of the elven
princess
life and light
past my defences

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

blood and guts

Young and bold
eighteen years old
start the car
we're off to war.
Tragic fright
dimmed our sight
clipped our wings
burning metal
sings
doomed our
right
to pleasant
sight
young and bold
eighteen years old.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

ashleigh in banbury

moon light
tip toes
cross
milky islands

softly dancing
playfully prancing
off tiny diamonds

can you feel me
gently kiss your ear

can you hear me
softly whisper

that i love you

while you sleep
i trace your
shape
in the
dancing prancing
moon light

do you know
i love you
still
as i linger high
o'er your bed

Thursday, April 05, 2007

a moment?

How long is a moment?
Can anyone say?
Is it fixed?
Solid?
Fluid?
Frozen
minute
Or so big
it could hold the entire
Universe without touching the sides?
Can any one say?
What occurs in
A moment in time?
How long is a moment?

Monday, April 02, 2007

compassion

i see her
sitting in a
fog
behind an old
mossy log
deep in thought
hating herself
for what is
wrought
transference
counter-transference
i can see her
feel her
know her
i would hold her
i would be her
if for but a moment
to relieve her pain.

mainstream rejection

mainstream rejection

you see it on their
faces,
flat pancakes

it's written in their
smiles
tight thin lips smug little lines

Eyes do so betray them
down cast
cold and blank

Tis truly sad to see
them hating life
so much

They feel the need to
to uplift themselves
by pushing
you
down
mainstream
rejection.

Friday, March 30, 2007

sex

male, female
boy girl
girl girl
boy boy
boy girl boy
girl boy girl
STOP
what is it?

bio
psycho
social
hot cold
fast slow
soft hard
sticky
gooey
sweet sour
good
bad
sad
grey
sex

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Bits

Bits and pieces of lives now lost
the price of love and life the cost
Warmth and joy removed, in their
stead remorse and dread
The path once clear now full of dead

Awash upon the sea of pain
enticed by the constant morphine rain
Tossed and rocked to and fro
ever to be without the sight
I give my soul to endless flight

The end is night the darkness light
no longer to fight in death is might
never ending strife only
lusterless life

Adieu my friends the sweetness ends
the pain withdrawn I sing my song
sweet song of ending
sweet sweet song.

I cried

I cried when the penguins told us we did
not pray hard enough for JFK, yeah we killed
JFK not the gunman on the grassy knoll.

I cried when my Grandfather died.

I cried sitting with a friend on a comfy floor
in front of an empty fireplace. saying our
first goodbyes, knowing we would meet again.

I cried in the middle of a deep wood
sitting with my back against a lob-lolly pine
looking up at the amber sky through
the bottom of a bourbon bottle

I did not cry while i loaded my
357 round by round. i did not cry
when i placed it in my mouth

I cried when i thought of
never seeing my friend again.

I have not cried since
but thanks for showing me
how
should i ever find the need again
i cried

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Dawn in the West

Things are changing very fast
The time is near its come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

Now you pay for your dance
you know the price you took your chance
the man awaits to settle the score
Payment in full he closes the door

Thing are changing very fast
The time is near its come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

The day is dawning to feast with the beast
Turmoil and strife in the east
pain is pleasure, death is life, the children flee
from the new wife

Things are changing very fast
The time is near it's come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

The bitch is free, she begins her spree
Newborns blood
spilled to her glee

Eternal night, no more light
Eternal night ,no more light

Things are changing very fast
The time is near it's come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

e-mail

when i check my email
looking for a sign from you
it's just another nail
for the lost love connection
but before i jump
gotta say
i can always count on
walmart being there
yahoo makes it too
and always #n%hfd
can't forget spam

so tell me why it is
i never get a letter from
you
must be a character defect on my part
but thanks to walmart I always
have **new mail
i can always count on walmart being there.

Monday, March 26, 2007

tow headed boy

Tow headed child with eyes afire
your smile doth warm the coldest day
your voice so full of glee the birds bow
down
may you grow up straight and tall
may you stand so strong and proud
you will live forever in my cold
sad heart
I will hear your voice when my
ears are deaf
See your smile when my
eyes are blind
feel your breath when i breathe no more

the touch of your hand upon my nose
the warmth of your body upon my chest
the strength oin your arms touch of your lips
as you kiss me good night

you will never know how much I cared
you will never know all that i wanted to share
so grow up strong and grow up fair
for
i love you son
i truly care
11 nov 91

Destiny

The time has come
my son
long awaited much delayed
to sever the chains
bind you

Unsheathe the sword
make your stand
life so fragile
your time
at hand

Swing it hard hear it sing
destoy your lobnds
stand refreshed
cleansed
drink
from the chalice and
begin anew

Strong right hand
wisdom is the left
the time of the
destroyer is
on the land.

life so short to be detered
power is nigh
steal your destiny
stand on high

Raise the sword
hearts afire
feel the might
feel the desire
strike now
strike hard
your time has come
your time is now.

healing in the here and now

writing heals in
the here and now.

It is of highest importance to acknowledge, understand and
put the past into perspective.
If the anchor that is dragging us down
is not redressed then it will continue
to weigh on us in the present and the future.

Examining the past with a critical eye...
understanding the events and removing our
selves from that event.
Forgiving if you would perpetrators
knowing that we have moved on from that time.
knowing that we choose to grow stronger from those events
and then making the supreme effort to move
from this mooring
into our present

we give ourselves the strength
the control
and the purpose to continue...

we get our strength not from the regret, remorse,
and hatred from those events
but from the liberating fact that we are now choosing to exert
control

and move from the past into the present.
yeah ??
are you with me

bottom line we learn from confronting the past....
the writing is reminding you me everyone who truly writes from the heart of how strong the emotions are that we carry with us.
It is if you would
the first step towards healing.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

herricaine

calm, pulse
gentle breeze
caresses me
now it quickens
gathers speed
the heart in tow
oars in the water
begins to row

racing now sweating
pumping, pounding
damn near drowning

bile is rising
throat is
burning

eyes are blurred
stomach stirred

mouths gone dry
i begin to cry
within the prison
continue to try

the wry expression
leering, peering
in
dread and loathing
the froth is coming
blue then
sickly green
purple yellow
orange then
black
lighting flash
no where to dash
hail and rain
flood waters rush
gentle touch
for now as such
it turns to pain
how can egress ensue
when the herricane
comes in to view
batten down the tongue
hide all emotions the
humiliation has begun.
retreat first passive
then aggressive
the end will come
when the storm
is done
there is no way to
get away
so settle down
all is grey
here she comes
the herricaine

Friday, March 23, 2007

Infinity

Infinity
Locked into love heart and soul
Never to see the woman I know
lost in a fog to thick to see
never lost love
It's too good to me.

Locked into love heart and soul
never to see the woman I know
god of Hate, god of Love
turned your eyes from me
left to die asea
Locked into love heart and soul
never to feel the the woman I know
going home the end is near
loved you forever till death
us do part.
1991

Later daze

I hear the hawk scream
above the din of the storm
pure clear
it comes to me
Reminds me of times not so
long ago
When spirits soared
when all was
one
a time when peace was
won
The owl now flies to my
beck and call
Haunting calls from
the deepest wood
Sorrow pain Its sweet
refrain
no more to see
no more feel
the times are gone
the day is done
Goodbye my friends
I'll nere see you again

Silver Soldier

Silver Soldier take your stand
raise your sword high in hand
seek the meek in your land

Be the homeless,feel their plight
In the pitiful and the poor is great might
Feel their hunger, feel their strife
Plant the Seed lead the fight!

Armour up against the Blight
Guide your people thru the night
Death to all wrongs strive for right
Destroy obstructions to your sight.

Conquer all within your sight
Crush all with you strength and might
Lead on push on through the night
Lead your people towards the light.
15 May 1984

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Hate

Alone
I stood
no hope in sight
Condemned by fate
and a sires hate
to live a lie.
He sees all die
he's stolen all hope
stolen all life
soon to die.

1991

Another night

Another night without your voice
another day without the light
one more day closer to the dark

Eyes that shine with constant hope
smiles that guide the way
Warm arms to wrap me in

One will live,
alone and dark
back turned towards the sun
the path is clear
for all good is all evil
none can change
the path chosen for them

Love is light and light is dark
a fond goodbye to all of this
for now I must merely
exist.

children die

i am a small boy,
i think i am
a small girl,
maybe?
hey you I am hungry, feed me
why do you stare,
why don't you kill me
my life is night
yours is day
i see the red star
i see the pale moon,
i see the promise
of freedom
i see the children die,
hopeless, hungry
dirt smeared faces, tattered clothes
Who's to blame?
no one in sight
my hunger has not shame,
no color, nor sexuality
i hunger.
why do you starve me
how did i hurt you?
did i lie to you
help me for i am ignorant and
i do so want to eat, my brothers
and would want to eat
but they are dead, i think
what is our crime
what is so horrible that
we must endure this?
i am surely in hell,
i am a small boy
i am a small girl
we are hungry
no more to hear
no more to breathe
the children die

children die

i am a small boy,
i think i am
a small girl,
maybe?
hey you I am hungry, feed me
why do you stare,
why don't you kill me
my life is night
yours is day
i see the red star
i see the pale moon,
i see the promise
of freedom
i see the children die,
hopeless, hungry
dirt smeared faces, tattered clothes
Who's to blame?
no one in sight
my hunger has not shame,
no color, nor sexuality
i hunger.
why do you starve me
how did i hurt you?
did i lie to you
help me for i am ignorant and
i do so want to eat, my brothers
and would want to eat
but they are dead, i think
what is our crime
what is so horrible that
we must endure this?
i am surely in hell,
i am a small boy
i am a small girl
we are hungry
no more to hear
no more to breathe
the children die

Why?

Why do you hurt?
Where have you been
to see the terror
and the pain that resides
in your eyes?
So young and tender,
where is the light given you?
where is the hope ?
where is the sense of
wonderment?
does it always die
so soon?
do you care for what
may be, or do you
only care for what will
never be?
is life so painful that
only death is cheerful?
who do you hurt?
they seem not to care,
motivated to do what is right for them.
they have lost their way
they have not seen what you have seen
forgive them for they know not what they do
tell them of your pain, share with them your burden
look for the sun,reach for the light, give him
a dreadful look
why do you hurt?
why?

1984

Starry Night

In the starry night
i found, you
none but you could i see
your hair ashimmering
eyes ablaze with lunar flame
my heart did you steal
my soul did you enthrall
my knees did wobble
my heart did strangle me
my palms near drowned
in the starry night
i found you
i owe my life to
that starry night
for without you
there would be
no starry night
no lunar flame
for that night
would i have lost
my life and
nere would i have tasted
the sweetness of your life
in the starry night
i found you

March 1991

Monday, March 19, 2007

A peace to you

A peace on you
take heart,
it will not last forever
avoid the dart, be clever
no matter what you
hear
avoid the fear
It will not last forever
As long as you endeavour
It will not last forever
Don't hold your breath
avoid the clever,lever,never
sweet is the smell to your nose
your death a perfect rose
A peace on you
Take heart
We do not last forever

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

day and night.

Vanilla on chocolate
mosco en leche
what the hell does that mean?
white on black
a fly in the milk
sweet and rich
hard and soft
strawberry's
blueberry's
night falls
and I sleep.

Monday, March 05, 2007

lady of the moor

she is gone
no more to share
in her radiance
no more to live in that far away land
where she and I
loved
played
danced.
remember her smile,
remember the melody that was her voice.
I will walk away and seek the blackness
where only i can see.
she is lost to me
Vaya con dios mi alma
mi corazon
mi vida.

chastised

How horribly lonely it is in this small space.
behind closed doors waiting
afraid some one will come and have a look in.
so horrible that no one will ever see these thoughts
feel my shame
feel the pain
feel the anguish and torment
that burns synapses and deadens the senses.
how stupid to think that anyone would ever want to understand where I am
much less what I feel.

you are evil and you do not deserve understanding
you did not understand while you were cutting a a broad swath through life.
who are you that you think anyone could ever love you
no! you will always be watched
always be scolded, chided,scorned
derided.
always feel the wrath of the self-righteous.
they will never know nor ever care of what it is you feel.

you should feel more
you should be burdened more
you should be killed and resurrected until the final horns are sounded.
you are truly a man of sorrows.
you are in the place you were born to be
this is your lot in life
this is why you are here
you will never feel Her soft kiss again
never trace Her outline in the dark
never feel Her love,
you are worthless.
you are judged
chastised
Lets speak of love
and worn out spaces
of dreams, depression
and fading faces.
Lets call on that
while we no longer believe
lets kick the cat
lest we begin to grieve
We try to smile to seem alright
when all is dark as
the blackest night.
Time to cut and rend and bleed
gut the oppressors
please take heed
Lets speak of love and worn out
spaces
of dreams, depression
and fading faces.
who cares for one
when one is done
once loved when
times were fair
no rejected without
a care.
Lets speak of love and
worn out spaces
of dreams,depression
and fading faces.

numb

Children cry
old people die
young men burn
take their turn

Numb to all
no need to call
children cry
old people die
young women burn
take their turn

numbing cries
searching eyes
strain for meaning
all that is seen
is the leaving.

Children cry
old people die
young ones burn
take their turn.

adios my friend

Adios my friend
I can feel me slipping away
thought I'd say adios now
while I can still feel my
feet on the ground
Adios my friend
of all the one's I've known
you've been the one I
could never put down.
Adios my friend
crisp and clear
to the end
Adios my friend
I loved you then
I love you now
I love you my friend
Adios now at my end.

putting on the face

Get up in the morning
stumble to the door
God, why is it the same
don't know where or when
don't know where I'm going
but I sure know where I've been
Get up in the morning
putting on the face.
hide the
horrible dreams
lost feelings
don't know where I'm going
but I sure know where I've been
cold water shocks
chases away the dreams
locked in the midst
don't know where or when
this is, just can't find the way
Get up in the morning
farther away from it
farther down the road
farther away from
true love
farther down the road
Get up in the morning
putting on the face
time to get back to the rat race.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

come

Come and say goodbye
to your friend
it's but a short time
to the end
he's tired and cold
not so old
going back to
the fold
Come and say good bye
to your friend
he's in he midst of a
crowd so loud
cowed, in a shroud.
Come and say good bye
to your friend.
it's but a short time
to the end.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

frost

Frost on the ground
lays glistening
a blanket of
fallen stars
from above.

Frost on the ground

Fog waxes and wanes
like a tired old mind
near clear
then blank
clear again

Frost on the ground

Ghostly shadows chase
the moon
silhouettes soft and full
tracing outlines
true love

Frost on the ground

Stealing away
these moments of
time
touch
smell
sound sight
stolen moments

Frost on the ground.

Friday, February 02, 2007

cardboard robin hood

cardboard robin hood
smiling out at the tiny face
green cap long feather
pale face red goatee
carboard robin hood
straining out at the tiny face
green cap long feather
pale face red goatee
dark it is
under the bed
cardboard robin hood
getting wet from
the eyes of the tiny face
why can't you shoot them with
your arrows
cardboard robin hood
torn and tattered
living still
in the mind of the tiny face
cardboard robin hood
under the bed
cardboard robin hood

EAST COCKROACH

Pigpen
porka
knucklehead
greaser spic
White trash
east cockroach
They're only children
Pigpen
porka
knucklehead
greaser spic
too brown
not white enough
east cockroach
slap that lil shit
he just called me
white trash
Pigpen
porka
knucklehead
greaser spic
not in the head
not in the head
east cockroach
you knocked him out again
poor lil boy
pigpen
porka
knucklehead
greaser spic
east cockroach
white trash

Thursday, February 01, 2007

spyder

Spyder
pleasant smile
nod of the head
merry tunes
happy days
Spyder
weaves his shimmering
web of
deceit,
pain,
suffering
with
delicate fingers
he
sprays
splays
relays
Spyder
cares not for
their dread.
laying still
watching
them from his bed
weaves his shimmering
web
deceit
pain
dread
Spyder
scampers about
sucking the life
out
Spyder

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

I'm afraid
I don't know what to tell you
I'm oh so tired
I don't know what to tell you
I 'm not sure I will make it
I don't know what to tell you
I'm sure it is too far from here
I'don't know what to tell you
I'm oh so tired
I don't know what to tell you
I'm afraid
Muddy roads
worn down shacks
wisps of smoke
from old red stacks
tattered blankets
this and that
Hominy grits
n' fat back
Corn fields, scrub oak,
mesquite trees
blue skies
cotton fields
Muddy roads

Dead

Dead
Brown grass
Evergreen trees
Old yellow house
Broken glass
Dingy grey skies
purple mass
blackening eyes
come the morrow
the fight begins
all the sorrow
Casper and his friends
the torment never
ends.

Monday, January 29, 2007

edge

running on the edge
feel the burning
wind is calling
heads are turning
night is falling
running on the edge
confusion
delusion
illusion
running on the edge
crimson drops
forming fast
here they
come
coming fast
drips
blips
I feel it
now
running on the edge
They say it’s a lie
to want to die
running on the edge

Never

never saying
what we mean
never wanted
never took
never meaning
what we say
ever haunted
silent look
tears as fine
as winter's wine
much too heady
Silent words
such as these
much too heavy
never spoken
yet understood.
quiet times
yet clear
I hear
silent words
such as these
denied
never spoken
yet understood.
much to heavy
lied
proper things
hard
to find
proper things
to which
to bind

ramblings

silence
well except for all
these racing thoughts
screaming in my head
slience
pleasant smile, nod of the head
facades

Empty
sun is
always in my
eyes.

Corn fields, scrub oak
mesquite trees
blue skies
cotton fields
freezing fog,
rolling hills
the Thames
island in
the fog
seated in heavenly places

blackness settles over me
quiet pub
warm fire
whispers in my mind
Silent words
such as these
never spoken
only understood.

quiet times
yet clear I hear

silent words
such as these
never spoken
only understood.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Delusions, illusions
wrinkled skin
urine stained
toothless grin
reeks of gin
does not know
where to begin
memories of bygone days
looking past
no one stays
wrinkled skin
urine stained
toothless grin
reeks of gin.
does not know
where to begin
are these my golden days
delusions, illusions
Is this my sin

poor man soul

Poor man
soul made of whiskey and blood
poor man soul made of whiskey and
blood
sits all day in his easy chair
sits all day and cries
and he cries about
all the people out
in the cold winter snow.
and he wonders when
the time will come to see his
friends again.
yes he sits all day in his
easy chair
sits all day and cries
and he cries about
all the people out in
the cold winter snow
and he wonders when
the time will come to see
his sons again
cuz he sits all day in his
easy chair
sits all day and cries
and he cries about all the people
out in the cold winter snow
yes he wonders when his time
will come to see them all again

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Whiskey breath and matted hair

Whiskey breath and matted hair
Oh my gawd how did I end up here
is that puke in my ear?
last thing I heard was

beer maid shot of jack
and a beer
corner table over there
Whiskey breath and matted hair
trying to forget
forget about you
beer maid make that a double
corner table over there.
whiskey breath and matted hair.
lovely porcelain

cold to the

touch wonderful god

that I love so much

Worship at his throne

day and night

whiskey breath and matted hair

two more beers over theree.

sadness

sadness
comes and goes
ebbs and flows
sadness
always grows

blue

blue
texas skies
blue bonnets
eyes
doll babies that cry
blue

Thursday, January 11, 2007

You weigh on me
your laugh
your voice
you weigh on me
I cannot stop
I will not stop
you weigh on me
like a stone
around my neck
you weigh on me
I feel you in my sleep
I hear you in my mind
you weigh on me.

I see your face

I see your face
hiding in my mind
shining full of life.
I see your face
it calls to me
but I am here
and you are there.
I see your face
loving and kind
with just a touch of
mischief on the side.
I see your face it calls to me