blood and guts

Young and bold
eighteen years old
start the car
we're off to war.
Tragic fright
dimmed our sight
clipped our wings
burning metal
sings
doomed our
right
to pleasant
sight
young and bold
eighteen years old.

ashleigh in banbury

moon light
tip toes
cross
milky islands

softly dancing
playfully prancing
off tiny diamonds

can you feel me
gently kiss your ear

can you hear me
softly whisper

that i love you

while you sleep
i trace your
shape
in the
dancing prancing
moon light

do you know
i love you
still
as i linger high
o'er your bed

a moment?

How long is a moment?
Can anyone say?
Is it fixed?
Solid?
Fluid?
Frozen
minute
Or so big
it could hold the entire
Universe without touching the sides?
Can any one say?
What occurs in
A moment in time?
How long is a moment?

compassion

i see her
sitting in a
fog
behind an old
mossy log
deep in thought
hating herself
for what is
wrought
transference
counter-transference
i can see her
feel her
know her
i would hold her
i would be her
if for but a moment
to relieve her pain.

mainstream rejection

mainstream rejection

you see it on their
faces,
flat pancakes

it's written in their
smiles
tight thin lips smug little lines

Eyes do so betray them
down cast
cold and blank

Tis truly sad to see
them hating life
so much

They feel the need to
to uplift themselves
by pushing
you
down
mainstream
rejection.

sex

male, female
boy girl
girl girl
boy boy
boy girl boy
girl boy girl
STOP
what is it?

bio
psycho
social
hot cold
fast slow
soft hard
sticky
gooey
sweet sour
good
bad
sad
grey
sex

Bits

Bits and pieces of lives now lost
the price of love and life the cost
Warmth and joy removed, in their
stead remorse and dread
The path once clear now full of dead

Awash upon the sea of pain
enticed by the constant morphine rain
Tossed and rocked to and fro
ever to be without the sight
I give my soul to endless flight

The end is night the darkness light
no longer to fight in death is might
never ending strife only
lusterless life

Adieu my friends the sweetness ends
the pain withdrawn I sing my song
sweet song of ending
sweet sweet song.

I cried

I cried when the penguins told us we did
not pray hard enough for JFK, yeah we killed
JFK not the gunman on the grassy knoll.

I cried when my Grandfather died.

I cried sitting with a friend on a comfy floor
in front of an empty fireplace. saying our
first goodbyes, knowing we would meet again.

I cried in the middle of a deep wood
sitting with my back against a lob-lolly pine
looking up at the amber sky through
the bottom of a bourbon bottle

I did not cry while i loaded my
357 round by round. i did not cry
when i placed it in my mouth

I cried when i thought of
never seeing my friend again.

I have not cried since
but thanks for showing me
how
should i ever find the need again
i cried

Dawn in the West

Things are changing very fast
The time is near its come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

Now you pay for your dance
you know the price you took your chance
the man awaits to settle the score
Payment in full he closes the door

Thing are changing very fast
The time is near its come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

The day is dawning to feast with the beast
Turmoil and strife in the east
pain is pleasure, death is life, the children flee
from the new wife

Things are changing very fast
The time is near it's come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

The bitch is free, she begins her spree
Newborns blood
spilled to her glee

Eternal night, no more light
Eternal night ,no more light

Things are changing very fast
The time is near it's come at last
Can't change your mind the die is cast

e-mail

when i check my email
looking for a sign from you
it's just another nail
for the lost love connection
but before i jump
gotta say
i can always count on
walmart being there
yahoo makes it too
and always #n%hfd
can't forget spam

so tell me why it is
i never get a letter from
you
must be a character defect on my part
but thanks to walmart I always
have **new mail
i can always count on walmart being there.

tow headed boy

Tow headed child with eyes afire
your smile doth warm the coldest day
your voice so full of glee the birds bow
down
may you grow up straight and tall
may you stand so strong and proud
you will live forever in my cold
sad heart
I will hear your voice when my
ears are deaf
See your smile when my
eyes are blind
feel your breath when i breathe no more

the touch of your hand upon my nose
the warmth of your body upon my chest
the strength oin your arms touch of your lips
as you kiss me good night

you will never know how much I cared
you will never know all that i wanted to share
so grow up strong and grow up fair
for
i love you son
i truly care
11 nov 91

Destiny

The time has come
my son
long awaited much delayed
to sever the chains
bind you

Unsheathe the sword
make your stand
life so fragile
your time
at hand

Swing it hard hear it sing
destoy your lobnds
stand refreshed
cleansed
drink
from the chalice and
begin anew

Strong right hand
wisdom is the left
the time of the
destroyer is
on the land.

life so short to be detered
power is nigh
steal your destiny
stand on high

Raise the sword
hearts afire
feel the might
feel the desire
strike now
strike hard
your time has come
your time is now.

healing in the here and now

writing heals in
the here and now.

It is of highest importance to acknowledge, understand and
put the past into perspective.
If the anchor that is dragging us down
is not redressed then it will continue
to weigh on us in the present and the future.

Examining the past with a critical eye...
understanding the events and removing our
selves from that event.
Forgiving if you would perpetrators
knowing that we have moved on from that time.
knowing that we choose to grow stronger from those events
and then making the supreme effort to move
from this mooring
into our present

we give ourselves the strength
the control
and the purpose to continue...

we get our strength not from the regret, remorse,
and hatred from those events
but from the liberating fact that we are now choosing to exert
control

and move from the past into the present.
yeah ??
are you with me

bottom line we learn from confronting the past....
the writing is reminding you me everyone who truly writes from the heart of how strong the emotions are that we carry with us.
It is if you would
the first step towards healing.

herricaine

calm, pulse
gentle breeze
caresses me
now it quickens
gathers speed
the heart in tow
oars in the water
begins to row

racing now sweating
pumping, pounding
damn near drowning

bile is rising
throat is
burning

eyes are blurred
stomach stirred

mouths gone dry
i begin to cry
within the prison
continue to try

the wry expression
leering, peering
in
dread and loathing
the froth is coming
blue then
sickly green
purple yellow
orange then
black
lighting flash
no where to dash
hail and rain
flood waters rush
gentle touch
for now as such
it turns to pain
how can egress ensue
when the herricane
comes in to view
batten down the tongue
hide all emotions the
humiliation has begun.
retreat first passive
then aggressive
the end will come
when the storm
is done
there is no way to
get away
so settle down
all is grey
here she comes
the herricaine

Infinity

Infinity
Locked into love heart and soul
Never to see the woman I know
lost in a fog to thick to see
never lost love
It's too good to me.

Locked into love heart and soul
never to see the woman I know
god of Hate, god of Love
turned your eyes from me
left to die asea
Locked into love heart and soul
never to feel the  woman I know
going home the end is near
loved you forever till death
us do part.
1991

Later daze

I hear the hawk scream
above the din of the storm
pure clear
it comes to me
Reminds me of times not so
long ago
When spirits soared
when all was
one
a time when peace was
won
The owl now flies to my
beck and call
Haunting calls from
the deepest wood
Sorrow pain Its sweet
refrain
no more to see
no more feel
the times are gone
the day is done
Goodbye my friends
I'll nere see you again

Silver Soldier

Silver Soldier take your stand
raise your sword high in hand
seek the meek in your land

Be the homeless, feel their plight
In the pitiful  poor is great might
Feel their hunger, feel their strife
Plant the Seed lead the fight!

Armour up against the Blight
Guide your people thru the night
Death to all wrongs strive for right
Destroy obstructions to your sight.

Conquer all within your sight
Crush all with your strength and might
Lead on push on through the night
Lead your people towards the light.
15 May 1984

Hate

Alone
I stood
no hope in sight
Condemned by fate
and a sires hate
to live a lie.
He sees all die
he's stolen all hope
stolen all life
soon to die.

1991

Another night

Another night without your voice
another day without the light
one more day closer to the dark

Eyes that shine with constant hope
smiles that guide the way
Warm arms to wrap me in

One will live,
alone and dark
back turned towards the sun
the path is clear
for all good is all evil
none can change
the path chosen for them

Love is light and light is dark
a fond goodbye to all of this
for now I must merely
exist.

children die

i am a small boy,
i think i am
a small girl,
maybe?
hey you I am hungry, feed me
why do you stare,
why don't you kill me
my life is night
yours is day
i see the red star
i see the pale moon,
i see the promise
of freedom
i see the children die,
hopeless, hungry
dirt smeared faces, tattered clothes
Who's to blame?
no one in sight
my hunger has not shame,
no color, nor sexuality
i hunger.
why do you starve me
how did i hurt you?
did i lie to you
help me for i am ignorant and
i do so want to eat, my brothers
and would want to eat
but they are dead, i think
what is our crime
what is so horrible that
we must endure this?
i am surely in hell,
i am a small boy
i am a small girl
we are hungry
no more to hear
no more to breathe
the children die